(The Outfield staring at a pair of shoes. Photo courtesy of TheOutfield.com. Yep, TheOutField.com)
There was a small period of time in my life when my ringtone was the 1985 classic “Your Love” by the Outfield. But I had to change it. Why? Because I never answered the phone. Answering the phone would have required me to make “Your Love” stop playing, something that I could never justify. It negatively affected my social life and possibly cost me 2-3 friendships.
Today, I heard someone claim that Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” was the greatest song of the eighties. Look, everyone is entitled to their opinion. Except for that person. Because that person is wrong. As far as I’m concerned “Don’t Stop Believing,” “Livin on a Prayer,” Pour Some Sugar Me,” “Billie Jean,” and “Sweet Child O’ Mine” are all competing for second place.
Below is the music video for the greatest song of the eighties:
As you can tell, the video has everything:
- The catchiest chorus ever written.
- Unintentional humor.
- A creepy lead singer.
- Terrible special effects to make paint drip across the screen.
- This guy:
- Dudes that wear one ear ring.
Obviously, the star of this video is lead singer Tony Lewis who inexplicably doesn’t have his own Wikipedia page. If singing this song were all he ever accomplished (and as far as I’m concerned it is) that would still warrant a Wikipedia page longer than any U.S. president.
The way he immediatly commands the attention of the room the minute he walks in with his mullet and general pervi-ness is borderline breathtaking. Just keep telling yourself that you’re not equally as intrigued as this girl who he briefly checks out before walking past without speaking to:
Then there’s the lyrics:
Josie`s on a vacation far away
Come around and talk it over
So many things that I wanna say
You know I like my girls a little bit older.
What exactly this means is hard to say for sure, but it definitely sounds like his girlfriend is out of town and he’s about to cheat on her with an old lady.
I ain`t got many friends left to talk to
No one`s around when I`m in trouble
You know I`d do anything for you
Stay the night, we`ll keep it under cover
It only takes about 25 listens to actually decipher what he is saying here. By this point he’s mostly just mumbling. He sings most of the song looking like someone is trying to make him laugh.
Try to stop my hands from shaking
Something in my mind`s not making sense
It`s been awhile since we`ve been all alone
I can`t hide the way I`m feeling
Certain parts of the song really sound like they are written by a serial killer.
As you leave me, please, would you close the door
And don`t forget what I told you
Just cause you`re right, that don`t mean I`m wrong
Another shoulder to cry upon
Josie was never the wiser.
The real merit of this song is that it is made for bad dancing. You don’t actually have to know how to dance or be a remotely graceful dancer to dance to it. You don’t even have to be heavily intoxicated (although it helps). It’s too silly of a song to actually dance seriously to it. All you have to do it let the music take you away as evidenced by this glorious video of this man dancing in his backyard:
“…I’m going to post it on Facebook…”
I can’t overstate how fast I would have ‘liked’ that video.
Almost 30 years have passed since the “Your Love” came out, but the legacy lives on. It has been covered or sampled by B.oB., The Decembrists, Charles Hamilton, Lloyd, Katy Perry and Less Than Jake.
But the most random remake of the song was a reggae version of “Your Love” made by Wylclef Jean featuring the rapper Eve. It was created for the soundtrack of the Adam Sandler movie 50 First Dates. If that’s not the most random piece of trivia you’ve learned all day then your life is way more interesting than mine.
If you’re wondering what The Outfield has been doing lately you can get filled in on their poorly designed website, which will blast you with music the second you click on it. The site has an incredibly long biography page that details everything that ever happened to the band starting in the year 1980. But for some reason, it reaches 1984 and just says “To be continued” and the page ends. They didn’t even get to “Your Love.”
They also provide an email to contact The Outfield for non-booking inquiries. It seemed rude to not at least reach out to them.
I guess the point of the story is that there’s no bounds to the randomness for which I concern myself with.